Gone are the days when you would eat your ugali and sukumawiki and sleep soundly. We would appreciate the kind of life that our parents were able to give us regardless of whether we walked five kilometres to school or lived in a mud house. It didn’t matter. It only pushed us to strive for a better future. Today? It’s completely different thanks to social media.

When I see someone bothered that they cannot afford a certain lifestyle, I never judge them. I only empathize with them because sometimes the pressure is too much to bear. What do you do when all your friends are making it in life but you seem to be stuck at the same place? Parents and children are equally affected by what’s happening on social media. 

Effects of social media drain

As a parent, you want to give your child the best life possible. But what if you cannot afford to buy them the car they are demanding for? Some parents have been forced to take loans to give their children a posh life. This ends in premium tears when the parents can no longer sustain that kind of living and are unable to service their loans. In worse circumstances, they are forced to downgrade, leave the leafy suburbs of the city and move to the village. Adapting to the new life becomes even harder and stress and depression start knocking on their doors.

Millennials and Gen Z are flaunting their flashy lifestyles on Instagram and you would think you are the only suffering soul on planet earth. Recently, someone opened a Facebook group for people to share home improvement ideas. Some people had to leave the group because they could not stand the heat. You’d see posts like “I am only 19 years and I have managed to build my parents their dream 5 bedrooms house”. Someone who is around this age and is still living in their parents’ house or is struggling to pay rent for their bedsitter might be left feeling like they are losers. 

Social media can drain you and mess up your mental health. And it’s not something that happens in a day. You gradually start wondering what you are not doing right, why you are the only one who cannot afford a vacation to Bali, and why you are still travelling in matatu while all your friends are driving. You think you are the problem. You blame yourself for failing. You hate yourself for failing yourself and your children. You think life is unfair. All sorts of negative thoughts start to crawl into your head. You entertain them, and your emotional wellbeing is hit hard. This is how depression kicks in slowly by slowly.

How to deal with social media pressure

At this age, it’s almost impossible to do without social media because that’s where businesses are thriving and it’s how people connect these days. However, if you feel like the pressure is too much, you can take a break. Deactivate your social media accounts for some days and just focus on yourself. Spend time appreciating all the achievements you have no matter how small. Think about all the things you have and be grateful instead of focusing on what your friends have. As they say, comparison is the thief of joy. Don’t compare yourself or your children’s lives to others. 

If you have been feeling like you are worthless based on other people’s achievements, start working on your self-esteem. Once your self-esteem is ruined, you might not even have the courage to chase after your goals and dreams so that you can live that life you desire. Before others can believe in you, you have to believe in yourself. It has to come from within. A therapist can help you redeem your self-esteem before it’s too late.

Self-awareness

Becoming self-aware also goes a long way in helping you to have a deeper understanding of who you are and what you stand for in life. It will make you appreciate being who you are and that you don’t have to be like another person. You are unique, and you are enough. Accept where you are at the moment and realize that your situation will not last forever. 

Don’t live a lie trying to keep up with social media standards. After all, you don’t know everyone’s story. You don’t know what kind of business they do to get money. They could be in the wash wash business, maybe they got an inheritance, you just never know. Just stick to your lane and don’t believe every story on social media. Some people will do anything to show others that wameomoka yet they are struggling. Kwa ground vitu ni different. 

Always remember that you are not alone. We are here to walk with you to make sure your mental health is thriving and not just striving.